uzskaitau +++


"tobias" <oracullusTRINAM@yahoo.com> wrote in message 
news:gl9tjk$apo$1@trimpas.omnitel.net...
> katit gavom
>
>
> How do you turn a fox into an elephant?
> Marry It!
>
> What is the difference between a battery and a woman?
> A battery has a positive side.
>
> What are the three fastest means of communication?
> 1) Television
> 2) Telephone
> 3) Telawoman
>
> How are fat girls and mopeds alike?
> They're both fun to ride until your friends find out.
>
> What should you give a woman who has everything?
> A man to show her how to work it.
>
> Why is the space between a woman's breasts and her hips called a
> waist? Because you could easily fit another pair of tits in there.
>
> How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good?
> Put a nipple on it.
>
> Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up?
> Because they don't have balls to scratch.
>
> Why do women fake orgasms?
> Because they think men care.
>
> What do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes?
> Nothing, she's been told twice already.
>
> If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what
> have you done wrong? Made her chain too long
>
> How many men does it take to open a beer?
> None. It should be opened when she brings it.
>
> Why do women have smaller feet than men?
> It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand
> closer to the kitchen sink.
>
> How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When
> she starts a sentence with 'A man once told me...'
>
> How do you fix a woman's watch?
> You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
>
> Why do men pass gas more than women?
> Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required
> pressure.
>
> If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling
> at the front door, who do you let in first? The dog, of course.
> He'll shut up once you let him in.
>
> I married a Miss Right.
> I just didn't know her first name was Always.
>
> Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex
> drive by 90%.. It's called a Wedding Cake.
>
> Why do men die before their wives?
> They want to.
>
> Send this to a few good men who need a laugh and to the select few women 
> who can handle the bullshit!
>
>